Friday, August 2, 2019

Fat Friday #11: A Big Fat Reminder from a Big Fat Broad

The facial puffiness is colloquially referred to as a "moon face." It is a hallmark of people who have certain kinds of endocrine problems. Flushed skin is another symptom of endocrine problems. I feel hot all the time and become fatigued extremely easily. I have very low endurance. 

I am fully aware that exactly nobody would find me attractive. I give exactly zero fucks about nobody finding me attractive. Why does my or anyone else's worth have to be tied to how fuckable the average schmoe perceives them to be? I think the fact that hotness is the most coveted attribute is the sign of an extremely shallow society.

Further, I don't want to fuck you. I have the libido of roadkill, and I wouldn't bother myself with anyone who has so little depth that they go around judging and belittling others based on their physical appearance.

I spent 33 years trying to hate myself thin. I developed bulimia at twelve. Fortunately, I discovered Health at Every Size and Size Acceptance at 45, or I'd still be trying to hate myself thin at 54.

I no longer put up with people telling me how my body should be. They do not live in my body. I have a myriad of endocrine problems which mean that I will probably never be thin unless I do what my great-grandmother did. She developed acute myelogenous leukemia, dropped from 300 pounds to 95 in the space of a year, and died. But, hey, at least she cut a svelte figure in her casket, amirite?

People who scrutinize and judge other people's bodies are not worth my time. I refuse to participate in diet culture and all of the promotion of eating disorders and self-hate that it gives rise to.


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