FOAD Thursday: Unfuckingbelievable

 

Image by John Hain from Pixabay

“You won’t live long looking so fat”

Ornery sez: I worked with the elderly for approximately 25 years. Fat people in their 80s and 90s are far from uncommon and are in no worse health than their thinner counterparts, apart from the headache of having to constantly endure fuckwits telling them they need to lose weight so they can live longer.

“Have you heard of something called a diet”

Ornery sez: I most certainly have. I went on plenty of them during the 33 years that I tried to hate myself thin. The starve-relapse-regain cycle is bad for every body. Only about 5 percent of dieters lose weight long-term. Most of us long-term dieters eventually end up unable to lose weight even on extremely low-calorie diets. Google The Biggest Loser Weight Regain and read about starvation syndrome.

“Stop blaming having a baby for being such a cow”

Ornery sez: Stop blaming the victim of your shitty behavior for you being such a fucking cunt. 

“You should be ashamed for raising a child to think being fat is okay”

Ornery sez: You should be ashamed for thinking that your hateful behavior is okay. I suppose I shouldn't make the assumption that you can think. 

“Do yourself a favor and skip eating for about a month”

Ornery sez: Do us all a favor and fuck off into a black hole.

“The world would be better without fat pigs like you”

Ornery sez: The world would definitely be better off without pieces of shit like you. Please find a nice highway where you can play with hand grenades and razor blades. The sooner the better.

“Fat people are so annoying with their self love BS so just stop”

Ornery sez: Twats who go around looking for people to bully are such pieces of crap, so just stop.

These are just a few of the things that some really shitty people think it's okay to say to a young woman who is just trying to encourage others.

https://megboggs.com/i-am-human-too/

If anyone reading this thinks it's okay to say any of these things to somebody just because they don't look like what you think they should look like, forget fucking off into the sea. You need to fuck off into the sun. Not the sunset, mind. The actual surface of the sun, and the sooner the better, because you are a genuinely shitty excuse for a human being. 

Even if you think that all fat people "brought it on themselves" by "being lazy" and "eating too much junk food."

Even if you think that all fat people are "super unhealthy" and "caused all their own health problems."

There is never, and I mean not ever, an excuse for being that shitty. 

Meg, the blogger who received that vitriol, is a very nice young woman. She's the mother of a toddler, and she takes time to encourage others so they might not have to struggle as hard as she has. She is a genuinely good person, unlike those people who have nothing better to do than say hurtful and awful things.

If anyone ever wonders why I'm such a grouchy-ass misanthrope, read those comments again.

The world is filled with shitty assholes like the people who made those comments.

Sometimes I'm full of piss and vinegar and am ready to take them all on.

Other times I just feel sad for everyone who has ever been on the receiving end of such ugliness. 

Anyone who promotes the idea that it's acceptable to shame larger people "for their own good" can fuck right off too.

As for people who talk about dieting all the time, you annoy me, but I mostly feel sorry for you because I used to be you. I don't want to waste another minute obsessing over calories or "good" foods and "bad foods." It pisses me off that I have to think about carbs as much as I do. If I didn't have a dead organ floating around in my body, I'd never count a solitary carb, calorie, fat gram, or whatever else again. 

I don't wish ill on those still in the thrall of diet culture, although I admit to wishing that they'd STFU.

As for the bullies, I've changed my mind about the sun. Y'all assholes can fuck off into an active volcano. It won't take as long to get there. Start your journey today.

~Ornery Owl Has Spoken~

It seems like a good time to share this again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5adF0xlvM_U&t=1s

FOAD Thursday: Secret Scam

 

Free use image copyright Open Clipart Vectors on Pixabay

https://pixabay.com/vectors/comic-characters-man-mann-1296081/#

A fellow on Twitter asked if we believed in "The Secret," to which I replied:

I believe "The Secret" is a way to get large amounts of money from desperate people. When my son was in 8th grade, one of his teachers had the students read it & write letters to themselves to be opened @ 21. My son wrote, "dear future me, I hope you still think this is BS."

In continuation, when my son opened the letter from his teenage self at 21, he chuckled and said:

"Dear younger self, yes, I do."

When I was 18, I excommunicated myself from the Catholic church because I could no longer abide by the rigid, dogmatic, "my way or the highway" thinking. I was a rudderless ship being captained by a lost soul. Initially, I latched onto basic Paganism, reading Tarot cards, and doing spell rituals with candles and incense.

Unfortunately, my desperate need to understand myself and to BECOME SOMEBODY SPECIAL!!11!!! led to my falling down the rabbit hole of self-help books and New Age thinking. I stayed in this hole from 1985 until 2010 and spent thousands of dollars trying to "fix" myself.

I learned a few things on this long, strange trip.

First, the New Age and self-help industries are just as toxic and dogmatic as any church, and they love to blame the victim. Did you get sexually assaulted? Hey, it's not just because you wore that dress, Sunshine! It's also because you were sending out a low-energy vibe that attracted predators! If you put yourself into a den of wolves, you shouldn't be surprised when you get attacked.

Do you have a chronic illness? Well, it's all the fault of your low self-esteem and the fact that you aren't adhering to our approved diet plan. Your throat chakra is out of alignment because you don't like yourself, so now your thyroid gland has gone to pot. WHY DON'T YOU LIKE YOURSELF, YOU PIECE OF SHIT???? JUST LIKE YOURSELF, AND YOUR HYPOTHYROIDISM WILL BE CURED!

I shit you not, I read something pretty much like that.

I honestly don't have a problem with practices such as chakra meditation, which can contribute to relaxation and well-being. But tying these practices into a victim-blaming guilt trip isn't helpful, it's toxic.

I believe that stress can and does trigger and exacerbate certain disease processes. But it helps absolutely no-one to scold them about the need to be less stressed. The answer to that is, well, no shit, Sherlock! But it isn't always so easy to make it happen.

I was always struck by the fact that those who have money are more readily able to go on retreats, get massages, and, you know, get things fixed when they break down. I lived for years in a place that had no working furnace. I was working at the time, but couldn't afford to get it fixed. I also couldn't afford to get massages or even take time off from work.

We live in a society of haves and have-nots that is more Metropolis or Brave New World than some sort of egalitarian utopia. Those who perform the mundane, necessary jobs to keep society running are relegated to working in low-paying, stressful, demeaning, and often dangerous conditions rather than being given necessary protections, respites, and respect.

New Age thought preaches that everyone should aspire to become one of the upper echelon living life in the cloud city, high above the low-paid lower class. The lower class deserves to be in their strata, whether because they were born with inferior genes or because they are sending out "low" vibrations, making it their own fault that they are suppressed and living out a life of misery.

The Secret is horseshit. It has done a great job of making money for its creator, not such a good job at helping anyone else although there are a lot of people who have convinced themselves that it is their salvation.

Ornery Owl Has Spoken

Ornery Owl

Free use image by Open Clipart Vectors on Pixabay

FOAD Thursday: Fuck This Shit and That Shit

 Image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

While writing an email to a friend, I realized that I'm still salty about the way I was treated by my teachers and my family with my ADHD (which I didn't know I had until just last year, but when I think about it, it's glaringly obvious.) I know we've learned a lot more about it in the past 25 or so years, but I wonder why people's first impulses are always to be shitty and kill people's creativity. Fuck a whole bunch of that, and fuck them.

Also, fuck Blogger for forcing everyone to have the new, horrible dashboard that sucks. Lucky for Blogger I hate Wordpress worse. Where the hell is the access to my photos on this blog, Blogger? Or the photos on my other blogs? That made life simple. But, oh nooo, we can't have that. Now I have to upload the photos in each post.

Fuck all of this shit.

The Owl is Ornery and Angry

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

FOAD Thursday: Fuck Everyone Who Can't Think of a Better Insult Than "He's Fat."

I'm unfollowing anyone who uses the Orange Anus' weight as an insult. Ad hominem insults are the lowest form of attack & size shaming makes life misery for literal millions of innocent people. With all the horrible shit he's done fat jokes are the best you got? If so, you suck.

Some of the people doing this on Twitter were so-called "mental health professionals." Size shaming makes life miserable for literal millions of innocent people on a daily basis. Size-shaming promotes self-loathing and excuses abusive behavior against big people. Fuck a whole lot of that shit.

Fat and Ornery

Free Use Image by Open Clipart Vectors on Pixabay

FOAD Thursday: Jillian Michaels Can FOAD Forever

A response to this post.

You know, it's hard enough having to deal with diabetes without having it made into a character flaw by sanctimonious assholes. I'm glad that Kai Hibbard came at Jillian Michaels full force. 

I give no quarter to those who say things like being fat causes diabetes. I would hazard a guess that in the case of people like me there is a genetic factor that both caused my train wreck of an endocrine system and promotes a heavy body type. But many people who are built like me (myself included) are actually very good at restricting food. Yo-yo dieting has also been implicated in causing the problems that being fat gets blamed for, because, you know, starving yourself isn't good for a body.

Image copyright Open Clipart Vectors

Fat. And ornery.

FOAD Thursday: 21 "Harmless" Comments

Found in this post on The Mighty.

1. “There are so many people worse off than you.”

I heard this one a lot. One of the times I really remember was after our neighbor had died at 35 from leukemia, leaving behind an 8-year-old son. I know now that my bipolar disorder onset when I hit puberty. Back then, I was just seen as weird and hypersensitive. I was distressed because a fellow I liked didn't even know I existed. As the coroner took our neighbor's body away, my mother said to me: "there, you see, you don't have anything to be moping around about. Just think how much worse "Sandy" has it. She just lost her husband!

2. “You’re just like your mother/father.”

I think my mother may have said this to me at times, but it wasn't a real sticking point.

3. “You’re too young to be going through that.”

I heard this a lot. "You're too young to be tired all the time." "You're too young to be this sad." Turns out my thyroid was killing itself and I had a major mental illness coming on. So, I guess I wasn't.

4. “You’re pretty for a ‘big’ girl.”

When I was younger, I would get the "you have a pretty face. If you could just lose weight..." comments. Now that I'm older, people don't even bother with the "pretty face" thing. Maybe they can see by my chronic bitch face that I'd rip them a new one.

5. “Why can’t you be more like your brother/sister?”

My brother was always the favored child. Since he was a boy, he didn't have to do chores. He always showed more promise.

6. “I’m sorry your feelings got hurt.”

The day my father died, my mother was trying to think of a song that he liked. When I said which one she might have been thinking up she told me to stop talking. I sat there with my hand on my father's arm looking at her like "what the actual fuck?" She said, "I'm sorry you got your feelings hurt." I just muttered, "Yeah, whatever." My father was dead, and I was her verbal punching bag at that point. My phone wasn't working properly and she had left two voice mails before I realized she had called. In the second one, she informed me that my father had passed, that I needed to get to the hospice center, and followed this up with: "you're never there for me." 

7. “You need an attitude adjustment.”

Usually, this took the form of "stop looking for attention."

8. “You need to try harder.”

"Stop being so lazy."

"If you'd just try harder..."

9. “Don’t be selfish.”

Ah, yes, I'm well acquainted with this old chestnut.

10. “Are you sure you want to be [occupation]? That’s a lot of hard work.”

This one too.

11. “Everyone gets sad sometimes.”

I felt like saying, "well, 'everyone' doesn't want to kill themselves." But I didn't say it, because I didn't want to end up in the psych ward again. That place was hell, and I made a resolution that I would literally die before going back there. I've kept that resolution for the past 38 years. I have had some really bad crashes, but I will die before I ever set foot in a psych ward again.

12. “OK.”

Usually followed by "so, what do you want me to do about it?"

13. “Well, life isn’t fair.”

I'm very familiar with this gem.

14. “It’s all in your head.”

Whenever an anxiety attack would come knocking.

15. “I’m disappointed in you.”

My family was perpetually disappointed in me.

16. “You were an accident.”

I never heard this, but my mother did tell me that she never wanted children.

17. “You won’t be able to get a job if you don’t get good grades.”

I generally got Bs with a few As and the occasional C thrown in, so I didn't tend to hear this. I did hear that I wouldn't be able to get a job if employers knew that I'd ever seen a psychiatrist, so I needed to keep that shit a closely guarded secret.

18. “I don’t want to be seen with you looking like that.”

My clothing choices tended to be a source of contention.

19. “You have no idea what it’s really like to struggle.”

I know this one well.

20. “We were doing fine financially before you kids came along.”

They never said this directly, but I always felt like I was a burden.

21. “You’re so shy.”

This took the form of "you're too shy," followed by the spectacular advice that I should just be more outgoing. These days I can make small talk with clerks and such, but I never approach anyone I don't know unless I have to.

FOAD Thursday: A Love Letter to Richard Marx

Popstar Richard Marx has proven beyond the shadow of any doubt that he truly should go eat a bag of dicks.

Wow, @richardmarx , nice. Someone invents something that could help the sort of person who can walk but not very far at a go, whether that reason be pain or weakness, and you have to say something shitty. I used to like you, but not anymore. Fucking ableist prat. 

Yes, I tweeted this at him. So disappointing. I loved his album "Rush Street." I played it over and over. At this point, fuck him. I don't care how good a singer you are, it doesn't make up for you being an utter knob.

I can't stand up for long periods of time before I start having severe pain in my right leg. Walking is better than standing, but I have to take a lot of rest breaks. I'm trying to rebuild my strength, but my worth is not dependent on my being able to do so.

Since @richardmarx has proven that he is not just a musician but also an ableist douche canoe, I have a little song I'd like to dedicate to him. He can pucker up and kiss my disabled ass. Having trouble walking & standing does not make a person worth less. Nor even does being "unfit," you sanctimonious, bigoted, asshat, self-righteous concern troll.

Richard Marx can take his "concern" for the American people's "health" and shove it where the sun don't shine. He can also go pound sand up his ass, go piss up a rope, go hump a stump, go eat a bag of dicks, go fuck a cactus, and, last but not least, FOAD.

It's really disappointing when your heroes turn out to be dickwads. 

FOAD Thursday: "Think Thin" foods

It's not that Think Thin's food tastes bad. 

Their instant oatmeal is less sweet than Quaker's instant oatmeal, plus it has added protein and fiber.

Their snack bars taste pretty good.

But they can FOAD with their push for obsession on thinness.

"Think Thin."

In other words, obsess about your weight. 

It doesn't matter if you feel better physically when you aren't fashionably emaciated.

It doesn't matter if you have no energy when you're fashionably emaciated.

It doesn't matter if the hair on your head starts falling out while the hair on your body increases and your periods stop although you're too young for menopause and you become prone to stress fractures when you become fashionably emaciated.

It doesn't matter if you think about food constantly because your body is malnourished.

It doesn't matter if you'd rather focus on other things beside your weight, either because its stupid to obsess about your weight in the first place, or because you have a history of eating disorders so you don't want to obsess about your weight, or you have a fucked-up endocrine system so you know you're always going to be fat unless you become critically ill.

You need to THINK THIN, Bitch.

Because nothing is more important than being thin.

Not satiation.

Not happiness.

Not peace of mind.

Better deat than fat, amirite?

There is nothing worse in the world than being fat.

So, you better THINK THIN!

No matter what you'd rather be doing, THINK THIN!

No matter if you want to make peace with yourself because trying to hate yourself thin is a fucking waste of time and energy.

THINK THIN!

Obsess on that thinness, you bitches!

Obey the edict that grown-ass women should look like pre-pubescent girls.

And be subservient like pre-pubescent girls.

THINK THIN!

How about fuck right off with that shit?

Honestly, it would have been better if they'd named this product High in Fiber So You Can Take A Proper Poop. Or Eh, It Tastes Better Than The Wrapper It Came In. Or, This Shit Doesn't Have As Many Preservatives As Some Similar Shit. 

Anything but Think Thin.

So, here's a big fat FOAD for the manufacturers of Think Thin products for this Thursday's FOAD.

Real Cie Reviews + FOAD Thursday: Harassment is Sexy and Fat People Aren't Even Human

Rating: Since there ain't no zeros, I'll give you a one

Nora Roberts' Nightshade is a trope-laden mess. Initially, I enjoyed the "hard-boiled detective narrative from a female perspective," but, fairly quickly, the cracks began to show.

I became tired of the male protagonist disrespecting the female protagonist's comfort zones and this being written as sexy rather than as harassment. She was not only supposed to endure it, but she was also supposed to enjoy it. Because nothing is hotter than a guy who won't take no for an answer.

The icing on the unpalatable cake was the "disgusting fat cat lady" who "had two chins and was working on a third," and the hero could see "at least two hundred pounds of bulk under her dress." This woman proceeds to "rub one of her chins."

I thought that Eleanor the cat lady was the most interesting character in the whole mess. I would have enjoyed reading Eleanor the Cat Lady's story. I would like a whole series of Eleanor the Cat Lady stories, where Eleanor is written as an interesting, eccentric, large human being, not a revolting, sub-human stereotype.

How hard would it have been to say that a large, elderly woman answered the door, and the hero could see several cats lying in the windows and on the furniture? The personable lady smiled and invited the hero in for cake and coffee. She was wearing a loudly colorful tunic which she may have made herself.

How easy it would have been to make the character both large and eccentric without being hateful.

Fuck Nora Roberts, and fuck every author who can't write a large character without insulting and dehumanizing them.

So done with this shit.

Cie does not recommend this book and she is unwilling to even share a link to this book even though she needs every cent she can get her broke-ass hands on.

Here is a link to my Goodreads review.

FOAD Thursday: Boycott Pourtions: Clueless Encouragement of Eating Disorders At its "Finest"

Macy's got dragged for selling this atrocious, body-shaming product and they pulled it from their shelves.

Here is what "Pourtions," the company that manufactured this overpriced, size-policing shit show had to say

As the creators of Pourtions, we feel badly if what was meant to be a lighthearted take on the important issue of portion control was hurtful to anyone. Pourtions is intended to support healthy eating and drinking. Everyone who has appreciated Pourtions knows that it can be tough sometimes to be as mindful and moderate in our eating and drinking as we’d like, but that a gentle reminder can make a difference. That was all we ever meant to encourage.

Well, sit down before you hurt yourself, you sanctimonious schmuck, and let Big Mama school your entitled ass.

"The important issue of portion control."

A lot of big people do have an issue with "portion control," oh Sanctimonious One.

It's called "being food insecure."

That's right, a lot of large folk do not have enough to eat, let alone to buy your overpriced crap designed to encourage them to hate themselves even more than they've already been taught to do all their lives.

I, for one, only eat one or two meals per day. Neither of these are large meals. I eat like this because I can't afford to eat regular meals. Even though I have diabetes and should be eating regularly, I can't. Yes, I have a problem with "portion control." I can't control the fact that I'm not able to eat enough because when you're disabled you're forced into poverty. Therefore, as I have wisely said to many fat-shaming asshats, "fuck you."

"Pourtions is intended to support healthy eating and drinking."

Yes, if you call encouraging eating disorders "healthy eating and drinking," I guess this crap is doing it right.

"It can be tough to be as mindful and moderate in our eating and drinking as we would like."

You know what, Genius, if you're hungry all the time, you're doing it wrong, and I swear to the goddess, anytime I hear that fucking phrase "mindful eating," I just want to puke on somebody. By the way, I spent a good number of my years forcing myself to puke after eating. I started doing that when I was twelve, so I could, you know, fit into "skinny jeans." Because after all, only horrible bloated land whales wear "mom jeans", whatever the hell those are. Because after all, there's nothing ickier than the body of a mature woman. Seriously, ewwwwww! If you don't have the figure of a pre-teen girl, you're doing it wrong!

Never mind that there are healthy fat people and unhealthy thin people. Never mind that there are thin people who can shovel in food by the truckload and not gain weight and fat people who practice "mindful portion control" to the point of starvation and are still fat.

In short, fuuuuuuuck you.

"A gentle reminder can make a difference."

Yes, "food coma" is a high-larious "gentle reminder" to all you ham planets out there that you need to mindfully restrict your portions lest you end up wearing the horrible Mom Jeans. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is worse than that.

In closing, may I gently remind you:

FUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU!!!!!

Thank you to "The Mighty" for sharing this cluster fuck.

I will share some better plates for you to put on the table at the end of the post. Because you deserve good things, whether you are a slender reed indeed or large and in charge. You deserve plates that you can eat off of which won't have shitty messages written on them needling you to hate and deprive yourself.

Love,

Cie

FOAD Thursday: To All The People Who Made Me Think I Was Stupid

Slow on the uptake, maybe, but not stupid.

I say "slow on the uptake," because it took me 54 years to realize that there were a lot of people who were full of a lot of shit who made me feel bad about myself for no other reason than I do life differently than they think I should.

There was the school psychologist in sixth grade who told my parents that I was borderline retarded because I had trouble with the pattern recognition portion of the I.Q. test. Even though I was writing at an eighth-grade level when I was in fifth grade, I supposed that I must just be stupid, because in sixth grade the teacher gave me an F on my story for following my outline too closely. He said that I must have written the outline after the story, which I did, but only because he said that we would be docked points if we didn't follow the outline we wrote for our stories closely. I don't and can't write that way, so I wrote the story first.

About ten years later, I learned that I was actually somewhat dyslexic, particularly when it came to numbers and patterns. Didn't stop me from thinking I was stupid, though.

To Gina or Tina or whatever your name was in the eighth grade who sneeringly called me a space cadet.

I think about too many things at once and have a tendency to go off in multiple directions. It may be somewhat frustrating to deal with a person who's like that, but it isn't an indication of stupidity. There are many intelligent people whose thoughts tend to be scattered. It might be an indication of ADD/ADHD, but not a dull mind. Anyway, I can't even remember what your name was, so I don't think you really matter in the scheme of things.

To all those along the way who have called me stupid, an airhead, a flake, and a loser, at long last, I say "fuck you."

Yes, I can be kind of a flake sometimes. I have a bad habit of agreeing to do things when I'm emotionally in a good place and then wanting to run and hide when I actually have to do them because I'm afraid I'm just going to screw them up. I'm a bad fit for a normal job because of this tendency. 

Being a bad fit for normal jobs doesn't make me lazy or stupid. It only makes me a bad fit for normal jobs.

Overly sensitive? Yes, probably, although there are plenty of people who are extremely insensitive, so it can be a push.

Defensive? Rather definitely.

Weird sense of humor that most people don't understand? Guilty as charged.

Weird in general and doesn't fit in with normal society? Absolutely.

Depressive, introverted, geeky, withdrawn, and possibly not even actually from this planet? Indeed.

Stupid?

Nope.

You don't get to hurt me with that one anymore, because it isn't true.

I may not have figured out how to use the weird gifts I was given in a lucrative way, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid. It just means that playing by the rules doesn't work for me.

~Cie~

FOAD Thursday #1: The One Who Should FOAD Most Of All

Are you surprised?

This complete asswipe sociopath bastard shitgibbon despot, Cheeto Stalin, needs to fuck off and die more than pretty much everyone in the entire world, if not the entire Universe.

Except maybe for his supporters. They can fuck off and die too.

I'm so glad this fuckwad is in hot water.

I said to my son that I want to see him impeached so bad.

My son said he'd rather see him go to jail.

I said certainly that's what should follow impeachment.

Even if my life continues on the same dismal trajectory, it will be a glorious day when this fucking asshole gets what's coming to him.

For the good of all, Lord Dampnut seriously needs to fuck off and die.